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Ancestry and Fear

I took the Ancestry DNA test over 8 years ago and my DNA results continue to evolve as more people submit their DNA. I know some feel it’s a controversial topic to give your DNA for analysis, but for me, it is important to try and find family rather than living in the “what if” fear.

The ocean always represents a sense of unknown and power to me. It can be feared and it can be enjoyable, all based upon where you're at.

Many of you know me personally, and some knew me in my younger days, and now that I’m encroaching on 40 (GASP!), I’m a very different person. I make an honest effort to not live my life in that place of “what if” fear and to not get bogged down by too much external noise. I have been in that place in my life, where my anxiety was so high, that every move I made had a “what if” counterbalance. (What if I get sick, what if they hate me, what if I die, that kind of “what if” fear.) I was miserable; my heart raced at every thought, and I was sick to my stomach. I was fearful of making the wrong decision, so I wouldn’t make a decision. I’ve worked hard to let it go; to just acknowledge and give away those thoughts and fear, pass it on, and accept that my decisions are made to the best of my knowledge.

I could go on and on about fear–I am a professional coach who works with people on releasing the fear that is holding them back while encouraging and supporting them to do great things that bring them joy. I had a lot of fear about sharing my grandfather’s story. I was nervous about sharing my story because I was scared of the judgment from family and friends, the vulnerability it takes to write (when I’m not a trained writer), putting honest and open thoughts out into the world. It can be a lot, but in the end, life is short. I want to share my story, I want to find my Czech family, I want to inspire others to search and find their families. I want to be here to help you find your family, and support you in your quest to find out who you are.

This post started out with my sharing about my DNA, but it took a turn to express my story about fear and why it’s taken me so long to share. It can be scary to research your family; you might find out things you don’t like, you might discover your ancestors were not good people–but this does not define who you are. Whether your ancestor was a part of the confederate army, a plantation owner with slaves, or a Nazi (a whole other can of worms on my dad’s side of the family), our ancestors made these decisions based on their lives at that moment, not thinking about the future of their actions nor the lives of others. We may share the same DNA, but it does not define who you are. Your actions and thoughts define who you are. You can change your thoughts and perspective, to put more love and kindness in the world.

I’ve talked with many family, friends, and friends of friends about their families since starting this project, and I’d love to hear and talk with you more about your families and family history. I am here to support you and help you. Please reach out and share your stories with me. I’d love to learn more about you.


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